I put a cute plum colored shirt dress on Lily today. I paired it with multi-striped matching knee highs. But she gave me such a hard time about the knee highs and dress shoes. Which is why tomorrow she'll probably show up in "Hello Kitty" sweats.
Honestly, I'd love to dress Lily up in more stylish homemade clothes to school but I struggle with the same thing a lot of moms do.
For Lily, it has to be simple, comfortable and no frills. Knee highs are unusual therefore they are bad. Belts are bad. Most boots are bad, even many dress shoes.
Any one else out there struggling with practical vs. stylish kid clothes?
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22 {comments}:
YES! My Lily is four and very opinionated about what she will and won't wear. I don't shop for her without her anymore and I have to ask her opinion on the fabric before I make anything. It's so frustrating!
My experience with three younger sisters and now my own 4 year old daughter is that you can't make them into something they are not. For certain outings (when I want her to look a specific way) I give her choices between two or three outfits. She has a "choice" but all are acceptable. My sisters all grew into their own style, one only recently started caring, and she is 19! :) Mothering requires a lot of patience and grace! It's hard to remember that these girls don't have to be mirror images of ourselves.
They aren't dolls they are kids. Of course they want what they want. Cut them some slack, they aren't kids forever. You'll teach them all about style as they grow, and sometimes they will want function (comfy) over stylish. And sometimes they'll want style over comfort. The important points are to teach them to dress themselves while having some sort of thought about what goes together and what doesn't. But ultimately, it's their body. Their choice. So don't fuss about it too much!
Seems kind of strange to force your child to be stylish. They're kids.
My daughter is wearing an old pajama shirt right now because it has Dora on it. I attempt to 'dress it up' with jeggings and gold sandals hahaha! Both my kids wear what they want most days, unless they are going somewhere fancy :)
Oh I so agree, only my 3yo daughter veers towards tights and dresses and ballet flats every day. I can barely get her into jeans! I have to consult her or talk her into most of my fabric choices (i can go gray/blue if i convince her it's an "alice and wonderland" dress, otherwise she'll opt for pink every time). So hard when you want a little variety in what you make!
@Marilyn@brite@Adrienne James
Honestly, I was a bit tempted not to write this post because I was guessing a few people might jump down my throat about wanting to dress Lily up in clothes I liked which is just silly.
I think it's perfectly fine to lament her disliking an outfit I bought or made. Forcing her to wear something that made her uncomfortable is another issue. If Lily doesn't like something I bought or sewed for her it pretty much just sits in the back of the closet and I figure hopefully in the future I can use it for Molly.
Most days I let her pick what she wants to wear to school but today we were running late so I had to go upstairs and choose and knee highs were what I picked.
I don't think I'm a monster for wanting her to wear something I think looks nice on her. I've talked to other mothers who've lamented this from time to time. (specifically tacky character clothes, which BTW I let her wear, not because I like them but I like to see them excited about it).
Although I appreciate that the negative comments were not anonymous, I wish it weren't so easy for other mothers to be so judgmental of a simple honest thought I felt like expressing.
Just saying....
Emily swings in the other direction there. She won't even wear pants and feel that dresses are best when they are long, twirly, and covered in ruffles. I just have to be careful not to send her in something she can't play in. I also make sure her teachers know that even it it looks like she's running around in her Sunday best she's not. We do wear sneaks with everything though. My choice not hers.
Ugh! Yes! My 4 year old girl is very opinionated about what she will wear. Plus, she is so long and skinny that the things that are her size look like a mini teenager and I am not ok with that. So I have to repurpose things for her because she likes a lot of color and embellishments but I cannot keep up with her anymore! It's driving me nuts!
The word "struggle" implies that I am actually making an effort, so I guess my answer would have to be no, no struggle here. As long as my son is (mostly) dressed appropriately for the weather/occassion, I don't worry about it too much.
Nothing could be more normal than wanting to dress your child--boy or girl--in clothing that we like. Since we have to buy clothing for them anyway, many of us want it to be as nice/cute/fun as possible?
That said, all parents quickly find that kids have their own little clothing quirks. Whether it is their own ideas about what is comfortable, fitting in with everyone else, or even choosing to stand out in a crowd, it is easier to go along with a kid's fashion sense as often as possible rather than to argue. Been there, done that. Looking back, I'm glad I let it go. (And, yes, I was really disappointed that my daughter would not wear those cute clothes I liked and one son would only wear sweats for about four years straight.
Should you feel guilty for being disappointed? No way! You're just saying what lots of us feel or have felt. People who are not that interested in kids clothing are far less likely to understand your disappointment. I think you handled the situation with your daughter beautifully.
@Stephanie
No judging here- I refuse to buy character clothes for that very reason. :) I'm just saying, it might be a losing battle and in the big scheme of things, relationship is more important. Obedience is important, too. And you did say it was a vent, so I think we all took it in that spirit.
And take heart- if she has an ounce of your style, she will be picking great outfits in no time.
Sorry- I hit the wrong reply...not meant for Stephanie, but Kathleen. :)
Totally my life. I have given up the struggle with my oldest. My youngest is a pleaser and will wear pretty much anything I pick out. I try to buy a combo of clothes that I like, versus clothes they like, i.e. pink, garish, sparkly, gaudy or anything that looks like a something a much older woman would wear. It is tough when you are a stylish person. You are not alone and are not a bad mom for wanting to make or buy your kiddos cute clothing. It is a big part of the fun when having a girl or so I am told. :)
I was that kid! Everything had to be comfortable and done myself. I didn't even let my mom brush or braid my hair until I was in middle school. When I was three and four I would wear the most horribly missmached things. I know that doesn't really help, but it does get better! Eventually I learned to wear nice clothes : )
ugh. my youngest refused to wear a dress for a year b/w the ages of 16 months and 2 and a half. and i had TONS of cute hand-me-downs from her twin sisters. not to mention the clothes i made for her including a dress with her initial on it that happened to be one of my favorite creations ever. nope. she wanted to wear her 4 year old brother's clothes. sweet. i tell ya, she looked fabulous. i feel for you. i have since decided not to buy or make her anything unless she asks for it specifically. good luck, mama.
I hear you! It is a bit frustrating buying simple clothing like jeans or cords to have my almost 4yr old insist on only wearing leggings or trackie pants! She even 'approved' the jeans. I thought I was being smart taking her shopping to do so. ughh, it was a daily battle so I had to stop caring so much about it and let it go. When it comes to dressing for parties or church - I have the last say!!!
oh my gosh, this little girl is 1. adorable and 2. more fashionable then i am. ha
xo TJ
My oldest is 3 and NOT a morning person. It's hard to get her dressed in anything, period. Even if she picks the outfit the night before, it's all moans and struggles (often with her trying to hit or kick me). I wake her up at 6:30 to ensure we have enough time to dance our dance about getting dressed w/o me being late for work. It's very frustrating. She's also very picky about clothes - and what seemed like a perfectly good outfit the night before is suddenly NOT ACCEPTABLE the next morning for reasons unknown. But then she won't pick out a new outfit and will only scream NO at whatever I pick out. Sigh. So we're not even at the practical vs stylish stage yet. Thanks for letting me vent.
I admit that I a) don't have many clothes for my kids(they don't wear all of them when I have a ton anyway); b) only keep clothes that I'm comfortable with them wearing(ie: no characters unless it's underwear or pjs); and c) then just let them do what they want. It's super hard to figure out the line between fashion and comfort. I just hope that if I give them some leeway but try to keep it to what I'm hoping that they'll come around. And I think that it's working. We have plenty of crazy clothes days, but when we were doing back-to-school shopping my 8yo boy picked some button down shirts to wear! I was doing a happy dance that it wasn't a t-shirt. So it will come(hopefully) and whatever you do will be just fine.
There's so many cute girl clothes out there but my little so-to-be 5 year old loves the basics, no frills stuff like Lily. I am so type A so this has been a frustrating area for us! One of my friends said letting them wear (almost) whatever helps express their creativity and boosts their confidence. So I try to let my precious angels choose BUT we do have several "Mommy" days like church or a party that I get to choose. My question is how long did this cute little girl in this picture actually wear this outfit and to what lengths of bribing did the mom have to go to?! Love your blog! Thanks for being real!
I LOVE to dress my girls up in stylish and cute clothes, but like you said some days it's a struggle. Getting my oldest to wear legwarmers, which is totally my favorite go-to right now- can be a battle.
So, vent away. Most Mom's feel the same way, and just won't say it out loud :0)
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